Lesson One: Everything you know is wrong.
I am Cat.
And I will correct it.
~Karina. Good friend. Trusted adviser in the fields of grammar and punctuation.I am Cat.
And I will correct it.
It has come to my attention in a rather abrupt fashion that people epically fail to correctly use Manners & Etiquette. As I consider these fields to be of immense diplomatic importance I have elected to create a vehicle for me to rant about this without a) pointlessly complaining and b) insulting people. Because that would fail the ‘Manners’ portion rather completely.
Although, in a side note, by articulating insults into a well thought and polite structure, you can often achieve a much more focused burn than if you lash out violently and incoherently. This is comparable to the effect of a cigarette to the skin as opposed to a Chinese Burn. Longer lasting and more effective.
In other news, let us continue onto…MAGIC WORDS!
Now this particular blog does not concern with the fantabularistic nouns, verbs and adjectives of Harry Potter and such ilk, rather, we are catching a time machine back to kindergarten.
Instructions
things you will need
* Humility
* Manners
* Ability to recognise when someone is doing you a favour
Step 1) If you’ve never heard of these words then I seriously question your upbringing. They’re quite easy to see, pronounce and utilise. You can even say them at parties! Fun times…
Though we learned this all a million years ago, sometimes we are so busy with school, breathing and life in general that we sometimes forget to say ‘PLEASE’ and ‘THANKYOU’ when someone does us a favour.
Step 2) This is pretty simple also, even if you’ve been raised by pigeons (or other fearsome beasts) you should be able to fake it half way decent (and for the record, innuendos are not classy) when it comes to expressions of appreciation.
Fairly basic really, any time that someone does something to help you, you say THANKYOU (may be shortened to ‘thanks’, ‘ta’ or ‘merci’ if you are French shaped), say this with sincerity and it will create a positive exchange that makes both of you feel good.
Step 3) There are six letters out there that will garner a lot of support for any request. The qualifier ‘within reason’ seems applicable here.
The word of course, is PLEASE. Whenever you need help with someone –big task or menial- just remember that they are the one’s doing you a favour –so leave the sarcasm behind, opt for some sincerity, and try using some honesty in your approach and it may just change the entirety of your outcome.
Step 4) Make eye contact. Seriously. You cannot underestimate how much this changes how someone will react to you. There’s a reason why eyes are referred to as ‘the windows of the soul’ and famous Impressionists, ‘Monet was just an eye, but –my God!- what an eye!’
Ok, we’re going to view a couple of situations with and without the implement of these steps.
Augie and Egbert are sitting at the Steps.
Augie: Give me my bag!
Egbert: …no. K’bye.
Egbert leaves.
Can we all see what Augie did there? She forgot to use the MAGIC WORDS!
Augie and Egbert are sitting at the Steps (again)
Augie: Egbert, *EYE CONTACT INITIATED* would you please pass me my bag?
Egbert: Certainly.
Augie: Thank you!
Egbert: Augie, could I please borrow –
Mina: You know what’s annoying?
Egbert: –your notes on –
Mina: When people interrupt you without saying ‘excuse me’. That annoys me immensely.
Yes Mina, that is indeed quite the annoyance. And that shall be the subject of my next lecture –er- blog!
much love and cordial affection
Cat. xox
